New ... here is my story

Thank you guys for not giving up on me. This was truly the best therapy I ever had. At first I was mad but then it started to sink in.

I'd love to know what kind of nut he is. Now I am horrified I spend two weeks in a foreign country with someone who could be crazy.

One little anecdote: I actually became friendly with his roommate here in NYC (she has since moved to another state). Sh went to see him in Turkey a few years ago. I don't know what happened but while she was there, he unfriended her, and her entire family (they were that close). She was the only one who defended him against the woman who posted on his FB page. She never would tell me what happened with him but she sometimes would hint that something happened that affected her deeply. But she used to call him her brother from another mother and he used to call her sis. Maybe she found out what he was up to.

ETA: Our dates when he was in the states were so normal. Sometimes we'd go out but other times he's come over and cook me dinner - he is a really good cook. Then we'd watch a movie and eat dessert. I didn't even sleep with him right away. He slept right next to me but no touching. He seemed to understand. He had to work as a waiter while he was hear bc he didn't have a work visa and this was an under the table job. He hated it bc he was used to having a better job. He seemed unhappy a lot of the time.

ruby wrote:That fat bird on the bed with those two children reminds me of those pair in East is East who were 'promised' to the Asian lads in the film, thats of course until the one lad returns from art class and his project (the hairy vagina) ends up on someone's head

Seriously Curly, it took some courage to post up those links. Get him out of your system, stop dwelling on this loser and find a local guy who can treat you with the respect you deserve. You are wasting head space and energy on a tosser.

Ruby

I'm glad I didn't have tea in my mouth when I read this. I actually felt sorry for her until she started slagging me on FB. I *tried* to warn her but she didn't listen. Said I was his annoying fan.

curlyboop wrote:

ruby wrote:That fat bird on the bed with those two children reminds me of those pair in East is East who were 'promised' to the Asian lads in the film, thats of course until the one lad returns from art class and his project (the hairy vagina) ends up on someone's head

Seriously Curly, it took some courage to post up those links. Get him out of your system, stop dwelling on this loser and find a local guy who can treat you with the respect you deserve. You are wasting head space and energy on a tosser.

Ruby

I'm glad I didn't have tea in my mouth when I read this. I actually felt sorry for her until she started slagging me on FB. I *tried* to warn her but she didn't listen. Said I was his annoying fan.

Curly

Dont waste your energy on trying to convince this woman, and certainly dont feel sorry for her, save your energy for healing yourself. Anyway she will only think you are jealous and making the story up to try and get her to leave him or vice versa. What he has done to you he will do to her. Believe me he will.

Ruby

Ruby

ruby wrote:

curlyboop wrote:

ruby wrote:That fat bird on the bed with those two children reminds me of those pair in East is East who were 'promised' to the Asian lads in the film, thats of course until the one lad returns from art class and his project (the hairy vagina) ends up on someone's head

Seriously Curly, it took some courage to post up those links. Get him out of your system, stop dwelling on this loser and find a local guy who can treat you with the respect you deserve. You are wasting head space and energy on a tosser.

Ruby

I'm glad I didn't have tea in my mouth when I read this. I actually felt sorry for her until she started slagging me on FB. I *tried* to warn her but she didn't listen. Said I was his annoying fan.

Curly

Dont waste your energy on trying to convince this woman, and certainly dont feel sorry for her, save your energy for healing yourself. Anyway she will only think you are jealous and making the story up to try and get her to leave him or vice versa. What he has done to you he will do to her. Believe me he will.

Ruby

Ruby

Total wast of my time. Don't know why she thinks I'd be jealous of her fat ass. LOL! What sucks for him is when he does wise up, she is going to do something that is going to embarrass him greatly. I can tell ... she invested too much and bragged too much.

How old is he Curly? I know you said before but I cant find it I think he looks like a loverat,hes got that look about him
I dont like sound of him having all these women everywhere, something smells fishy to me

Maria

Maria wrote:How old is he Curly? I know you said before but I cant find it I think he looks like a loverat,hes got that look about him
I dont like sound of him having all these women everywhere, something smells fishy to me

Maria

Hi Maria,

He's 35. Besides single mothers, he also has a lot of "friends" who are women looking to marry a wealthy guy to escape their countries - from Thailand, etc. Like it would make sense to me if he was just scamming women from wealthy countries but he isn't. A lot of them are young women who don't have any money themselves. I think he has some money himself. He asked me to bring him some stuff from the US but he sent me the money ahead of time.

It is very, very strange.

Hi Curly

I am sorry if you have already mentioned it on this thread, but has this guy ever been married before and does he have any children and has he ever left Turkey?

By the way, I saw your photo earlier and you look a happy, pretty lady, but I am afraid to say that this guy gives me the creeps, he reminds me of dracula, all he needs is a black/red cape and a couple of fangs. He looks like a creep and you dont look suited together, you can see you are respectable and he is, well odd.

Ruby

Hi Ruby,

You are so sweet! I was scared to post my picture because I was so jet lagged. He never let me touch his head, which bothered the hell out of me. He did smell good. LOL!

He said he was engaged before but the woman broke it off because her parents didn't approve of him. But who knows if that is true or not but he did seem broken when he talked about it. He also said he really wants children. Once we were talking about what we learned from each other and he said I taught him what it means to hope. At the time I guess I thought that was a pretty personal thing to say to someone.

I don't know if he ever lived anywhere else but Turkey but I know he used to work on a cruise ship for many years (and he had a lot of cruise ship friends who backed this up). He didn't run off and take any calls when we were together - of course, he was speaking Turkish and I don't know what he was saying.

Hi Curly

Thanks for giving that info. So he told you he was engaged but the girl's parents did not approve of him (I can see why!!), was this engagement to a Turkish girl? I ask this as Turkish parents 'vet' the prospective groom very carefully and if he doesnt match up to their expectations, they will not allow their daughter to marry him. Maybe he did something peculiar during their daughter's engagement period which made them call off the marriage.

You also say that you took him items which he prepaid you for. Can I ask you what these goods were?

Ruby

ruby wrote:Hi Curly

Thanks for giving that info. So he told you he was engaged but the girl's parents did not approve of him (I can see why!!), was this engagement to a Turkish girl? I ask this as Turkish parents 'vet' the prospective groom very carefully and if he doesn't match up to their expectations, they will not allow their daughter to marry him. Maybe he did something peculiar during their daughter's engagement period which made them call off the marriage.

You also say that you took him items which he prepaid you for. Can I ask you what these goods were?

Ruby

Yes, she was Turkish. From what I understand too is that he was working on the cruise ship at the time - six months on, three months off - and she asked him not to go back. So he left that job and started a business in Turkey. He said something about the government taking it away. That was all in his late 20s.

He had me bring him an unlocked Iphone4 and an Ipod2. He couldn't get them to work, though, because he can only have one electronic registered to his name and he already had an Iphone3. I had to go with him to that Turkcell place with my passport but they said to him if it was registered to me, it would lock after three months.

Curly

You have to count your lucky stars and think what a narrow escape you have had from him. He simply does not sound balanced. At least you are back home safe and you must use this unhappy experience to your advantage and never put yourself in this sort of danger again.

Ruby

I think of that too Ruby. I was in a country where I didn't know a soul. I also shudder to think of what would have happened if I found out about this woman while I was there and I confronted him. I truly had someone looking out for me.

He's very smarmy looking. He could be Peter Cushing's lovechild lol!

I'm sure you can do much better for yourself than him Curly.

Admin wrote:

curlyboop wrote:Strawbs, you made my day.

She's Indonesian. That is her in all the pictures. I'm not sure if those are her children. She's 29 so it is possible. He seems to have a lot of single mothers as "friends."

You are right about his body language. Even when he is turned towards her, his eyes are still looking at the camera. She is actively courting him. I don't know what possessed her to make a collage or take a photo of the pictures she has of him in her house. One other thing about him. He had all these vacation albums on FB and he is the only person in the pictures. So, who was the photographer??? I'm sure these pictures she posted made him pretty angry.

When I first met him, he seemed really interested in getting to know me and made an effort to spend time with me. He even spent his birthday with me. I wasn't wildly attracted to his looks but I thought he seemed sweet.

Hi Curly,


I need to re-read through some of your latest posts, as there's quite a few things I'd like to comment on. I'll have to do it in an hour or so (need to go to the shops) but I will be back very soon.

I do want to comment because I think this man seems very strange........

Later.

Strawbs

You cant still be at the shops.....or can you LOL.....I was told your time keeping can always be relyed upon LOL....

Guveclover wrote:He's very smarmy looking. He could be Peter Cushing's lovechild lol!

I'm sure you can do much better for yourself than him Curly.

LOL.........he could be Peter Cushings love child!LOL.....well spotted!....

I'm waiting for the analysis of this strange man too! BTW, his cousin poked me on FB. I ignored him.Never heard of Peter Cushings but I agree.

BTW, I've heard a lot about rats and their emergency hospital visits and then asking for money. My old rat was always going for some sort of minor surgery. He never asked me for anything but do you think he was shaking someone else down?

Hello Curly

How are you feeling today. I hope your spirits are lifted and you are having a good day. Any updates? Glad you did not respond to any FB pokes. Silence is the best treatment. Completely ignore all of them, in fact, block them.

Ruby

Ruby, you are so sweet to check on me. This month is hard because I was just with him so of course my mind goes back to how happy I was just a few short weeks ago. But of course reading everyone's reviews of his looks helps.

I'm not friends with his cousin so I'm not sure why the poke. I don't even know why he knows who I am.

Hello Curly

You are an attractive woman who does not need this double of dracula messing your head up. Even if this man was drop dead gorgeous, which of course he is NOT, he is trouble with a capital T. He is a no good loser, ugly both physically and spiritually and YOU deserve so much better.

You have to believe in your self, he has knocked your self confidence. Go look at yourself in the mirror and tell yourself you are an attractive woman who deserves only the very best from a relationship. This man was dangerous, totally bonkers and sounds like he suffered from a very severe form of OCD.

Curly there are some really good guys out there, when you feel better about your own self confidence, go out there and bag yourself one. In the meantime, just be grateful that you have had a lucky escape from this psycho.

I am sure Strawbs will give you more advice when she comes online.

In the meantime, dont give this man any more of your headspace, he is just an abuser and you have been granted the gift of losing him which one day you will be eternally grateful about.

Ruby

curlyboop wrote:I'm waiting for the analysis of this strange man too! BTW, his cousin poked me on FB. I ignored him.Never heard of Peter Cushings but I agree.

BTW, I've heard a lot about rats and their emergency hospital visits and then asking for money. My old rat was always going for some sort of minor surgery. He never asked me for anything but do you think he was shaking someone else down?

me too...got me all nosey saying he was strange then went shopping for 1 hour and isnt back still.....its Tuesday now

what minor ops did he have Curly?.....

I asked him about his surgery of course but he always evaded the question. I know of at least three since I've known him (one while he was here in the states). Judging from his strange behavior - always wearing a towel, jumping up and running to the bathroom DURING sex (you can imagine what that did to the mood) - maybe something to do with his butt and its functions?

I agree with all of you ... he is someone with deep, deep issues. Maybe he was hurt deeply by a woman so he never lets anyone get too close. All I know is, he has a lot of questionable contacts on Hotmail chat - scantily clad women with lots of male friends. Reflecting, I don't know if he was trying to con me out of anything long term but rather it was all for ego gratification.

Another weird thing (and of course you ladies can tell me if this is true or not). My friend was a nanny in turkey for six months and she said that it is extremely rare for a Turkish couple to even hold hands in public, especially during the day. He was always holding my hand, had his arm around me, or was Kissing my forehead. Once we were walking and I put my hand in his back pocket. He said I was going to make all the other men jealous. I always had to be touching him when I was near him. I'm sure he thought "western" women dug it so maybe that's why but was it frowned upon in his culture?

Curlyboop do you think he had piles? they can grow very big and hang out like a bunch of grapes, I read that in a medical book. reading more of your post and you sayin he liked you putting your hand in his back pocket coz it made other guys jealous, could he be gay? Its very confusing really. first off I thought he had an op on his privates (testickles) or even a sex change for a second but he looks very manly so it cant be that. Very odd.

Maria

Ouch Maria, piles, dont they look similar to a bunch of grapes? Could you imagine them being trampled on by a pair of hair legs?

Hello Curly

On a very serious note, you say that he had a lot of single mothers on his FB, do you think he was attracted to their children and was grooming the mum's in order to have a connection with their children. The internet can be a VERY VERY dangerous place, and if you are vulnerable, sometimes you dont see things that an outsider can see. Of course I could be totally wrong, but this guy certainly seems to have a very strange modus operandi.

I hope as each day passes you are feeling better physicall and mentally and are becoming a stronger person due to your very unfortunate circumstances. I do however reiterate, that you have had an extremely luck escape from this freak.

Ruby

BTW Curly, please dont feel you have to respond on this public thread to my question.

Ruby