Yet another American Fishing Trip Story

Quite honestly, it beggars belief what some of these American woman get caught up in, accept and believe. I always thought the USA to be the 'super power', wow some of these women are not fully cooked in the head. Just take a look at the some these extracts over on TC.

'Like I said before, he is a jealous and aggressive person but it does not seem to be so horrible. He is extremely protective as well.'

IF THAT HASNT GOT THE ALARM BELLS RINGING, TAKE A LOOK AT THIS

'Thanks! I will ask him and try it out when he comes back. I have cooked for him already and he really really enjoys it. He has expressed that he wants a girl who can cook, clean and take care of him. I told him firmly that I am fine with all of this (I enjoy cooking, cleaning, blah blah) but he needs to do his share as well. When I told him this he gave me a funny look and said of course he would help.

If things do get very serious with us, then I will make the trip to turkey to see his hometown. He is happy that I have expressed interest in this but knows that I want to wait and see where things go, this is perfectly fine with him.'

NOW FOR THE CHERRY ON THE CAKE

'A little update: he is coming home next week! I am happy that we will get to spend some more time together and see how things go. Also, he told me that his family is well known and pretty wealthy in the town of Izmir. His last name is Tatari, any chance you guys know anyone with this last name?
We did dicuss his family views and basically what makes him happy, they are happy with. His older brother is married to a German girl and lives in Germany and his other brother lives here in the US and is engaged to an American girl. Anyway, I am excited to see him but will continue to be cautious and take things slowly.'

I do wonder about the crediability of these posters, either that, or Turds are NOT interested anymore in coming to the UK, I think JW and her nutty counterparts have started a revolution of importing 'educated illegal pizza drivers' into the States whose 'true intention (as Billy Butlin would say) is all for your delight', but in their Turd's case, their true intention is for a work permit and Green Card.

Wonder if Ken will intervene and give this young woman advice? And fancy one of his parliament following the original poster's confession to revealing the Turd's true M.O. as:- 'Like I said before, he is a jealous and aggressive person but it does not seem to be so horrible. He is extremely protective as well.' saying

'I do agree with Sunny that a lot of Turks do return home and Meral's suggestion of coming here to Turkey is sound. If your relationship does progress you need to see him in his own surrounding and how the family structure works and therefore a few visits to his family in Izmir would be good, Whilst it's good that you will meet his parents in the US it will not be the same as seeing them in their own surroundings.

If you want to do something special for him you could maybe find out what is his favorite Turkish dish and cook it for him. If you look in the recipe section in one of the posts there is a link to a Turkish cookery site that was written by someone living in the US and I think you would find that very helpful.

This has a ring of Sirin speak to me



Ruby

What do you think, should I go over there and smack some sense into my fellow countrywoman? But hey, Judas said he had MANY women in the US why were DYING to marry him so he could get a green card. I guess anything is possible.

Hi Ruby,

You know, those members on that site make the numpties look quite steetwise sometimes! Why are they nearly all so thick? Some of them seem well-educated, yet they're as thick as pea soup!

All this nonsense about him not being after a visa - coming from a wealthy family blah blah blah. Wealthy Turks mix with OTHER wealthy Turks. There are plenty in Istanbul and Izmir. And wealthy Turkish families usually marry into other wealthy Turkish families. It stands to reason!

It is possible for a wealthy Turkish family to have one of their sons meet a foreigner abroad and fall in love, and I actually know of one hugely wealthy Turkish man who is married to an American woman he met while at university, and they now have three children and have been married for about 20 years. So it can happen.

But when all 3 sons marry Westerners (American, German..) that's, how should we put it - somewhat a coincidence? AHEM!! How very strange not one of them has married a young, beautiful Turkish woman from a wealthy family! After all, they all mix in the same circles! And just because they're wealthy and modern it doesn't mean they don't want to marry a fellow Turk who can speak the same LINGO, shares the same religion, is from the same culture - and has similar tastes!

It sounds to me that this man comes from a visa-seeking family, which could also account for why none of the sons married, say, a Pakistani, Indian, Iranian, Somalian, Nigerian, Tunisian.....

The apple never falls far from the tree...............

Strawbs

curlyboop wrote:What do you think, should I go over there and smack some sense into my fellow countrywoman? But hey, Judas said he had MANY women in the US why were DYING to marry him so he could get a green card. I guess anything is possible.

Curly, I suggest you read the thread Pudding Club to get a better grasp of where we are coming from. You are relatively new to these sites and dont really understand the background history. Furthermore, you were given an enormous amount of excellent and constructive advice and support from members on this site, so much so, that you are according to yourself well on the road to recovery.

Finally, Curly, I would never condone you 'smack some sense into my fellow countrywoman', you asked for advice, listened and acted accordingly. Some of these women, especially American women due to the accessability of the WWW and Turks tiring of the UK after hearing tales of woe from their friends who end up living in very deprived areas, target women in the USA for a better life and the prize of a Green Card. Your ex tells you he had women begging to marry him so he could get a Green Card. You know he is a liar, I dont believe women were DYING to marry him, why do you still believe what he told you? I would trust him just like I would trust a snake in the grass.

Ruby

Hi Curly,

Nope, I don't believe he had loads of women dying to marry him, either.

Unless they had a fetish......

Strawbs

ruby wrote:

curlyboop wrote:What do you think, should I go over there and smack some sense into my fellow countrywoman? But hey, Judas said he had MANY women in the US why were DYING to marry him so he could get a green card. I guess anything is possible.

Curly, I suggest you read the thread Pudding Club to get a better grasp of where we are coming from. You are relatively new to these sites and dont really understand the background history. Furthermore, you were given an enormous amount of excellent and constructive advice and support from members on this site, so much so, that you are according to yourself well on the road to recovery.

Finally, Curly, I would never condone you 'smack some sense into my fellow countrywoman', you asked for advice, listened and acted accordingly. Some of these women, especially American women due to the accessability of the WWW and Turks tiring of the UK after hearing tales of woe from their friends who end up living in very deprived areas, target women in the USA for a better life and the prize of a Green Card. Your ex tells you he had women begging to marry him so he could get a Green Card. You know he is a liar, I dont believe women were DYING to marry him, why do you still believe what he told you? I would trust him just like I would trust a snake in the grass.

Ruby

<blushing> I'm not very good at this I'm afraid ... I'm going to do some board reading so I don't stick my foot in my mouth.

I don't believe the liar at all.

Hiya Curly

Please dont beat yourself up about it.

I am so very pleased you listened to all the good advice and accepted the support we gave you on this site.

Be happy with your life, there is no need to blush , but I still insist your ex Turd is, and always will be a liar. You see, with a liar, sometimes they tell the truth and sometimes they lie, and the more lies they tell, the more expert they become at it to the extent that they actually start to believe it

You have a great day.

Ruby

I note that the desperately eager-to-please and emotionally needy JennyWrites (aka Mutlukadin) was swift to advise her fellow countrywoman on how to secure a Green Card for a Turk but totally ignored the elephant in the room - the fact that this woman's Turk is, as she calls him herself, "jealous and agressive". Of course, we all know that these are simply milder words for violent and controlling.

Why I wonder did JW not ask this woman about the occasions on which this man has become aggressive and what triggered his aggression? Why didn't she ask her how she has formed the view that he is jealous? This woman is clearly glossing over things - there must have been episodes (and probably several in truth) which have led her to form this view of him as "aggressive and jealous". You don't just form an opinion like that without a good reason.

Again, this clearly demonstrates just why the ridiculous supportive and non judgemental only ethos around many of these sites is so wrong - and so dangerous too.

These are HUGE red flags in this woman's story and they need to be raised as a matter of urgency by decent people. Goodness knows there have been terrible happenings of late that should make people more vigilent and sensitive to stories like these. It seems not though and the same old "go for it hon and I hope you'll live happily ever after" crap is still being trotted out. Why? Because it wouldn't be nice to say negative things that might upset people, shatter their dreams/illusions or dash their hopes.

The woman is clearly aware that something is not right with this Turk on some level but she's obviously trying to work it out and needs help with it. If she weren't she wouldn't have mentioned the fact that he is aggressie and jealous. Others there have counselled some degree of caution going forward but they have not gone far enough in my view.

No matter how good looking or good in bed a man is (which in truth is probably all that this so- called relationship is based on, other than the Turk's desire to gain permanent residency in the USA like his brother), if he is violent and controlling he is no use to you and you need to get rid of him sooner rather than later.

Maybe the reason JW didn't show any interest or concern in this is because she considers these things as normal for a Turk? I'm sure that through her rose-coloured specs she could quite easily put a positive spin on violence and jealousy in a relationhip and say both were healthy and necessary ingredients for a happy and fulfilling relationhip - in fact she probably has done in the past!

For anyone normal, the bit about the Turk being aggressive and jealous would be the only thing that stood out from the woman's story. That's certainly what happened to me when I read it anyway.

Hi Judith,

I haven't got time to reply to this thread, but I will do later - there's a lot I'd like to say!

Meanwhile, if you think that story is shocking take a look at this one on there!

http://www.turkeycentral.com/index.php?/topic/13081-marry-or-not-to-my-turkish-fiance/page__fromsearch__1

The woman is with a violent sponger who loses it and goes mad every so often! It sounds horrific.

Strawbs

And another one...

http://www.turkeycentral.com/index.php?/topic/13113-is-this-common/page__pid__61207#entry61207

These Americans ARE being targetted aren't they?!

They're online, too - remind you of anyone? Cheeky Chappie Sultan in the EGOTS chatroom? I remember those repulsive, sleazy winks he used to add at the end of sentence. Puke puke!

Anyway, I HAVE to get on now - we're going for a verrrrry long pre-Christmas lunch with friends and family!

So in advance please excuse what I write later this afternoon

Strawbs

These stories are more of the same aren't they Strawbs? So many of these men have an agenda (the internet ones being the most calculating and the worst in my view). The one in the USA has proved it already and the first bloke clearly does, which is why he's so desperate to get married. He can see his chance slipping away with his visa running out in January and I wouldn't mind betting the stress of that is causing him to keep losing it. She's booked the wedding for 3 January and he has to make sure she goes through with it. I bet he's living on his nerves!!

Sadly the first woman will probably end up getting a gentle PM and being re-directed to you know where. There she'll be welcomed in and advised to stick with him and by him if she really loves him because life's too short and she'll only ever regret what she didn't do, not what she did do. Everyone will focus on his positive points and gloss over his glaring negative points, putting it down to the stress of potentially being seperated from her again and and his troubled childhood. The woman is doing that herself already, blaming his violent outburts on things that have happened in his childhood. I think she really believes that going ahead and marrying him and giving him a couple of hours counselling with this friend of hers will make him good as new. I'm sure many on the pink and fluffy site where "if you haven't got anything nice to say don't say anything at all" will agree with her too! This woman should focus on her business and sorting out her children, who are clearly troubled. The last thing she wants to do is to bring another problem into the mix.

You're right, Judith - once you've read one story you've read them all really. But something about this particular woman rings a bell to me for some reaon? I don't know why - maybe she was on the numpty site back in the summer? You can be sure Sirin PM'd her on TC and invited her to join tl.COM. Ooh, you've gotta laugh! Dot.com! haha Actually, I'm wondering if this Hope woman alreaady knew Sirin (maybe she was introduced to Gemsgirl - she was offered appalling advice!)

If you read her first thread on TC - from the way she writes - she sounds very familiar with Sirin. Hmmmm.....

Another thing I noticed is that she said in her first thread, that they were applying for a visa in June 2011, and in her second thread she said he was coming over on September 9th 2011. So if he he's here on a 6 month fiance visa it wouldn't expire until March. I wonder if he got it back in July and wanted to sow more oats in Turkey - before coming over to see his Angel?

Did you notice how she said she was a member on there before - under the name Angel - O.M.G. And every woman thinks their askims are being original when they call them Angel! lol The twisted JW had that charming name bestowed on her by Flabby's father didn't she? I bet he was rubbing his greasy palms together while adding up all the dollar bills Flabby would be sending over to Turkey, once he could nab a gullible American wife!

Back to Hope - she's clearly desperate - and I think she needs more counselling than the visa-runt does. She's got into debt over him (and that's probably the tip of the iceberg) and no way did he have a few thousand in his bank account! Funny it vanished! That was either a fake statement (so easy in Turkey - even some banks out there will print one out for you - for a backhander) or he's hidden the dosh - which he probably got from some other poor gullible woman!

And all that crap about him having counselling - who is he or she to assume it's just counselling he needs? He might need medication. Or he might just be a nasty arse with a vicious temper! It's funny how she says it was all wonderful at the beginning - which means he could control his temper then - couldn't he!! But he can't control it now! What a load of bollocks! He's just showing his true colours (which he was capable of hiding at first) and his frustration at realising she's not the moneybags businesswoman he thought she was is sending him close to the edge.

I didn't see where she said they're actually getting married 3rd January? She must be insane! He's just a violent pig who wants a visa.

I've copied her threads below:








Hi Everyone,
Started by hope, Jun 10 2011 07:05 P
#1 hope

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Posted 10 June 2011 - 07:05 PM
Hello to you all! .It's been sometime since i visited the sight,in-fact so long i had forgotten my login details etc.
I was known as angel.
Anyway great to be back and hope i can pass on my experience and any advice as was very kindly offered to me when i desperately
needed it with regards to a visitors visa for my partner in Turkey.
I am in the UK and met the love of my life in 2009.To cut a long story short,after several visits I made to Turkey my partner was granted
a visitors visa and came to the UK for four weeks to visit me in April 2010 which was fantastic.
We then apllied again Jan of this year and sadly turned down as i had stated this time it would be for six months and not a short holiday!
I felt it was the right thing to do and be honest,we were hoping to spend a length of time together before deciding to get married!However we were turned down on the basis that they felt my partner wouldnt return,we were gutted though through it all,the stress and the strain, the ups and the downs, the highs and the lows
Our relationship has gone from strength to strength and we know we know we just have to be together come what may!

We have JUST applied for a fiancee visa(a week ago) with the help of an immigration lawyer who was superb!
I cannot begin to tell you how anxious i am,the stress is unbelievable,i am driving myself crazy as to what the outcome may be!,I would also like to take this opportunity to say a heartfelt thankyou to all concerned
who make life that little bit easier, having the support from each other who are going through the same situation via this forum!

Sorry for rattling on,great to be back,must work my way round now and get familiar with the site again!

Best wishes to all,

Hope
#2 sunny

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Posted 10 June 2011 - 07:39 PM
Welcome back hope/angel. Thank you for those kind words. We do our best to help people in whatever situation they are in, be it just for a holiday, for the stressful process of visas or advise on relationships etc.
I am glad that we were able to help you get over one stressful time and hopefully we'll be able to give you some support during the fiancé visa process, and at the very least wish you good luck.
ALWAYS FORGIVE YOUR ENEMIES; NOTHING ANNOYS THEM MORE! ~~~Oscar Wilde~~~


#3 Cukurbagli

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Posted 10 June 2011 - 07:40 PM
Welcome back to Turkey Central, good luck with your visa application.


#4 Abi

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Posted 10 June 2011 - 08:02 PM
Welcome back and nice to see you back again. Sorry to hear that you didn't get the 6 month visa but they are very hard to get hold of. It's often been said the fiancé or Settlement Visa's are a lot easier to get, so I'm keeping every crossed for you application as I know how stressful this has all been for you.

Good luck


#5 hope

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Posted 11 June 2011 - 10:49 AMHi Sunny,Cukurbagi and Abi.Thank you very much for your kind words and welcoming me back.I will of course let you know the outcome and how things go!
#6 Sirin

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Posted 11 June 2011 - 04:33 PM
Best of luck with the Fiance Visa application Hope. It's stressful having to wait for the decision, but as long as you meet the criteria, your chances are much higher than for a visit visa.

Hope you get a yes, and welcome back!
Jan
#7 Ken

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Posted 12 June 2011 - 12:41 AM
Welcome back, Hope, you're always welcome here.


#8 hope

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Posted 13 June 2011 - 12:35 PMThank you so much Jan,i hope we meet the criteria! I think with the amount of information i submitted we stand a chance.Am i right in thinking that i may expect a phone call from immigration confirming that i am the sponsor and happy to go ahead.Also Jan,i was told it could take anything from one to three months before we hear anything,what is your experiencefrom others that have gone through the same process?I understand things have changed over the years since you applied for yours,just wondered what the average time was!Thanks again Jan and for your lovely words of encouragement,chat soon.Best wishes,
Hope


Hi Ken,
Thank you so much,great to be back! Will keep you all posted!


Best wishes,

Hope
#9 Sirin

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Posted 13 June 2011 - 06:59 PM
Hi again Hope

Recently it does seem to be taking almost the full 12 weeks - whereas I can remember a time when a straightforward application might only take a few weeks.

We were really lucky with ours - you used to be able to go to North Cyprus, and if you queued from early in the morning you'd get a same day decision. Only residents of North Cyprus can apply there now.

I guess you might as well prepare yourself for the full wait, and anything less will be a bonus!

Jan
#10 hope

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Posted 14 June 2011 - 10:10 PM


Thank you Jan i better sit tight then,how things have changed!never mind will give me lots of time to prepare and clean house! LOL

Best wishes

Hope

hope

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Posted 01 September 2011 - 06:33 PM
Hi everyone,
Great news,my partner and i have been successful in obtaining the fiance visa! YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
After what has seem like forever we have persevered after two long years and we will begin our life
together on the 9th of September!
We had help from an immigratiomn lawyer which i feel helped very much.
However,after speaking with the lawyer today i have gone into panick mode and need some much needed advice
as after speaking to the lawyer today we are far from home and dry!