OK Numpty decides to go for a swim

OK, imagine this, you are in South Africa, on a Cape Town Beach, you fancy doing a bit of breast stroke but some tosser has altered the lifeguard that sharks are in the waters.

Lifeguard puts the flags up clearly showing shark activity and three beaches are promptly closed, but Numpty still decides to ignore these warnings and have a dip in the briney. The Lifeguard sounds a siren, but Numpty who originates from the UK but lives in SA continues to splish splash in the sea.

Strangely enough both his legs are bitten off by a shark, shock, horror.

Hyatum, what do you and Precious think of this crazy mother fxxker?

You know what, some people are just plain stupid, so stupid they are barking mad. Reminds me of a lot of people on TL and TC, they know the dangers but still go for a dangerous swim.

Ruby

Was that the one on the news today Ruby?

Pipxoxo

Yes Pip, thats the one on the news today.

Unbelieveable what dangers some folk will put themselves through knowing what the eventual outcome will be.

Ruby

Hi Ruby

Sorry did not reply sooner, have been away for a month on a Trans-Africa trip...very awesome!

Precious was scheming to reply but i took my 3G card with me so she could not connect up to go online...anway she also did so little work while I was away she packed on 5 kg's! She now looks like a very fat shiny brown hippo..she and Linzee would make a fine pair. While I was out wrestling with cannibals in the jungles she devoured the entire contents of my freezer and pantry, did zilcho work and watched tele all day. Anyway OUR opinion of the incident:

Prec says: Any mad Mlungu (white person) who bagutas (swims) in that butt-freezing water out in False Bay with those bloody big fish is going to end up like poor Jonah

Nicks says: Absolute tragedy....False Bay has a high population of Great White Sharks due to the seal numbers and only serious delinquents are going to go into the water after having been repeatedly warned about the dangers!

Hey I have missed this site....its such a good laugh,

Nicks

Hiya Nicks

So happy to read your post and I hope that you enjoyed your Trans-Africa trip. Where did you go Nicky? Did you get to see the big five on your travels or was it just cannibals?

I cannot believe that naughty girl Precious has piled on 5kg's by pigging out on your food, what a fat bitch, of course you must punish her and if I were you I would whoop that big fat brown arse of hers with a monkey tail and make sure you leave at least 6 welts on that double side saddled bottom of hers. and make sure she can still carry your kids around safely after. Next time you go out of town Nicky leave her a sack of Mielie-meal.

Nicks, I just love Precious's version of the shark attack, maybe just this once we should forgive her? Then again, maybe not, if we forgive her this time she will expect to be forgiven every time, best get that sjambok out and let her know who is Medem in your own home.

Seriously, really glad to see you back Nicky I have missed you and hope you had a great holiday, let us know how it went.

Ruby