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    Grandparents

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    Admin
    Admin

    Posts : 1570
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    Join date : 2011-04-24

    Grandparents

    Post  Admin on Sun Jun 05, 2011 8:02 pm

    GRANDPARENTS ANSWERING MACHINE

    Good morning. . . . At present we are not at home but, please Leave

    your message after you hear the beep.. beeeeeppp ...




    If you are one of our children, dial 1 and then select the option

    from 1 to 5 in order of "arrival" so we know who it is.

    If you need us to stay with the children, press 2

    If you want to borrow the car, press 3

    If you want us to wash your clothes and ironing, press 4

    If you want the grandchildren to sleep here tonight, press 5

    If you want us to pick up the kids at school, press 6

    If you want us to prepare a meal for Sunday or to have it delivered to your home, press 7

    If you want to come to eat here, press 8

    If you need money, dial 9

    If you are going to invite us to dinner, or, taking us to the

    theatre start talking we are listening !!!!!!!!!!!"




    WHAT IS A GRANDPARENT?

    (Taken from papers written by a class of 8-year-olds)

    Grandparents are a lady and a man who have no little children of their own..

    They like other people's.

    A grandfather is a man, & a grandmother is a lady!

    Grandparents don't have to do anything except be there when we come

    to see them.. They are so old they shouldn't play hard or run. It is

    good if they drive us to the shops and give us money.

    When they take us for walks, they slow down past things like pretty

    leaves and caterpillars.

    They show us and talk to us about the colours of the flowers and also

    why we shouldn't step on 'cracks.'




    Usually grandmothers are fat but not too fat to tie your shoes.

    They wear glasses and funny underwear.

    They can take their teeth and gums out.

    Grandparents don't have to be smart.




    They have to answer questions like 'Why isn't God married?' and 'How

    come dogs chase cats?'

    When they read to us, they don't skip. They don't mind if we ask for

    the same story over again.




    Everybody should try to have a grandmother, especially if you don't

    have television because they are the only grownups who like to spend

    time with us.




    They know we should have snack time before bed time, and they say

    prayers with us and kiss us even when we've acted bad.




    A 6-YEAR-OLD WAS ASKED WHERE HIS GRANDMA LIVED. ''OH,'' HE SAID, '

    'SHE LIVES AT THE AIRPORT, AND WHEN WE WANT

    HER, WE JUST GO GET HER. THEN WHEN WE'RE DONE HAVING HER VISIT, WE

    TAKE HER BACK TO THE AIRPORT.




    GRANDPA IS THE SMARTEST MAN ON EARTH! HE TEACHES ME GOOD THINGS, BUT

    I DON'T GET TO SEE HIM ENOUGH TO GET AS SMART AS HIM!




    It's funny when they bend over; you hear gas leaks, and they blame their dog.
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    electra_diva

    Posts : 9
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    Join date : 2011-06-03
    Location : Essex

    Re: Grandparents

    Post  electra_diva on Mon Jun 06, 2011 3:44 am

    This is funny - will pass it on to my mum and dad Smile

    Admin
    Admin

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    Join date : 2011-04-24

    Re: Grandparents

    Post  Admin on Tue Jun 07, 2011 6:11 pm

    Hi Electra,

    I liked that, too!

    My grandchildren can twist me round their little finger, but then again, my daughter can too!

    I'm not complaining, though.............. I love you

    Strawbs

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